I’d take a leap of faith but I’d lose my nerve

This is going to be a somewhat ranty woe be me type post but please bear with me. I want to write about life and achievements OR how I’m thirty and  done fuck all, the former is a nicer blog post but the latter does have a certain zing to it. Like most good stories let’s start with the beginning.

I recently turned 30 back in October 2016 and I do have to say I’m pretty happy now, after bouts of depression, the wheels have stabilized again and I feel like I’m on track, moving admittedly slowly but moving all the same. Over the last couple of months, maybe since after Xmas when I didn’t get that PS4 Pro from Sandy Claws, I started to evaluate my life and what I want from it and more importantly how I’ll get it.

I wouldn’t say I’m a stupid person, heck I’m able to type this out without causing a fire BUT I know I don’t apply myself. I find comfort in finishing my shift in work, going home, eating food and chilling with the family for a while. It’s fantastic but it can get to the stage of boredom. TV repeats and a joint lifestyle take away from life. In a relationship you need to talk about things but on a long enough timeline you run out of things to say or repeat the same stories from years ago. And yes I just used a Fight Club reference to talk about relationships, next it’ll be comparing American Psycho to children’s playgroup.

All this has lead me to improve myself, I find I have nothing new to say except news or the lowest of the fucking low weather. That’s exaggeration but the points still there. I used to read a huge amount, run 60 miles a week and write a hell of a lot more but they’ve just disappeared into the ether along with my motivation. So I’m going to start working on those again first before attempting anything more drastic like robotic engineering or cross stitching, but I wanted to write this post as a reminder and a booster shot in the arm to myself.

Next week you’ll get to meet Me V1.1

 

 

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